...

So...

A whole year without posting, huh..?

Oh how time goes by!

Hm? You wanna know what I've been up to?

Well yeah the last entry was ALREADY a comeback post, so this was bound to be awkward.

Welp, if I really have to go about explaining why I haven't been writing...

Get ready for...

THE GREATEST EXCUSE EVER BLOGGED

Which goes like this...

So I got diagnosed with scabies! God knows how I got it, but I sure did!

Turns out one of the symptoms of scabies is extreme insomnia!

And this managed to coincide perfectly with my first exam season!

Then my parents refused to pay for the treatment, so I was left with like 15€ for half a month!

So yeah, I spent that whole exam period roaming around like a starved, barely sentient zombie!

Grades were obviously not good!

And so my aunt kicked me out of her house!

Then it started to get better... Slowly.

I got into various arguments with several members of my family, but my grandparents actually helped me a lot...

They gave me shelter until I managed to find a dorm that was cheap enough, and helped with food and medicine.

During all this I stopped being friends with armadillo5. So yeah. Sorry for all you armadillo5 fans out there.

I won't go into extreme detail since I can think of at least one common friend who might read this, but the main impression I was left with is that she was only with me to get something very specific in return. AKA: She did not care one bit, and the second I withdrew she obviously cut the whole thing off.

So yeah. That was something fun to have happening alongside this all!

Anyways, to cut the rest of the rant short

My parents refused to give me more money after I switched to the shared flat, so I was stuck with very little to eat each month.

Then I got sick again...

Then I wasted my money on god knows what again, I don't even remember...

Dinner was very optional and usually consisted of like... 1 slice of ham...

Then I pretty much just said fuck it and dropped out of university...

And honestly?

Everything's been working out since then!

I just spent the last two months before summer partying and making some really cool friends...

Then I prepared to move back to the town I used to live at, and...

Well, to be honest, when I originally left, I wasn't really popular?

Which is a fancy way to say that pretty much half the town hated my guts because of one of my now ex-friends...

So I was EXTREMELY nervous...

But it just kinda... Panned out in the end? I rekindled lots of old friendships I considered dead, haven't encountered anyone with animosity towards me yet, and turns out lots of people were quite happy to hear about me coming back?

So... Yeah.

I'm still studying computer related stuff, just in a place that doesn't suck ass... I get to hang out with one of my best childhood friends while still calling my university friends often... Could be worse!

I must admit... The reason I postponed writing this entry for so long is... Well... I was kind of scared?

I mean, not at first. At first it was just me being dead. I mean after returning to 'normalcy'... I was scared of not really having anything to say, I guess?

Don't get me wrong, I like complaining as much as the next guy, but... Is that really all there is to this? No moral? No takeaway? Just "Oh woe is me"?

That's the way it felt at first. How else could I possibly talk about this year? But I think I've finally stopped to think, and...

There's a lesson, maybe?

I'm sure I'm not the only one who's been in a rough spot. Hell! I'm pretty sure my whole experience must have been pretty tame compared to what other people must be going through! Life is though!

And I really do wish I could have some enlightening advice that could heal all ailments... But I really don't have. What I can tell you is the following:

It gets better. And every time it's when you least expect it, so you just have to hold on. Bask in the little pleasures, since that's what life is all about in the end. And I know I sound extremely cliché when I say this but... I'm so convinced I wouldn't be sane right now if I didn't avoid the worst parts of reality to focus on the subtle things, y'know? Anything can be of use! The feeling of grass under your feet, the pleasant chill of a midnight stroll, the texture of a book you enjoy reading, the smell of your morning coffee, the first breath of air you get after opening your window each day... Just try to find what works and stick with it! Because no matter how easy it might seem to take the shortest route and make it all end on the spot... Every pleasantry you get to have is one you would miss out on if you were no longer here!

And even if that doesn't work, having people by your side will make all the difference, as long as they truly care about you, which trust me, it's always more likely than you think.

So... Yeah. Nobody actually reads these I think so, this is kind of an apology to myself at this point, but still. Sorry I haven't kept up with the blog.

I will keep posting! I hope!

I hope whoever reads this has a great day everyday from now on!

Am I being too cheerful? Maybe it's to balance out the previous rambling. Oh well!